Most people don’t come to a reading lightly.

Even if they’ve had a session before, there’s often a mix of emotions leading up to it—curiosity, hope, and usually some level of nervousness.

Sometimes that nervousness comes from not knowing what to expect. Sometimes it’s tied to something much deeper—wanting to hear from a specific person, or hoping for clarity around something that really matters. There can be pressure underneath it all, like I hope this happens or I hope I don’t leave without what I came for.

Some people arrive after doing a lot of research. Others come because someone they trust encouraged them to book. But no matter how they get there, most people are carrying something into the room with them—something they care about, something they’re hoping for, or something they’re not quite sure how to put into words.

Over the years, I’ve noticed that people often expect a reading to look a certain way, usually based on what they’ve seen or heard from others—the strongest moments, the clearest connections, the parts that get shared afterward.

But a reading isn’t just made up of those moments. It’s something more personal, and often more subtle.

It doesn’t always unfold in the way you expect.
And it’s not about getting everything you think you need to hear.

It’s about what comes forward—and how open you are to receiving it. 

How To Approach Your Reading

There’s a natural tendency to feel like you need to “get it right” going into a reading—to ask the right questions, hear from the right person, or make sure everything unfolds in a certain way.

But the truth is, you don’t need to manage the experience that closely.

The best readings are the ones where the focus isn’t on controlling what happens, but on allowing the reading to unfold naturally.

The more relaxed and open you are, the easier it is to take in what’s coming through. When we hold too tightly to a specific outcome, we can sometimes miss the information that’s actually being shared.

This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have hopes or questions. It just means leaving a little room for the experience to unfold in its own way.

What To Do Before Your Reading

Be Clear About Your Intentions   

It can be helpful to take a little time to think about what you’re hoping for from your session.

This doesn’t mean you need a perfect list of questions or a plan for how the reading should go. In fact, many times the information you need comes through naturally. But having a sense of what feels important to you—whether that’s guidance, clarity, or connection—can help you relax going into the session.

If you’d like, you can write down a few questions or topics so you don’t forget them. Think of this less as a checklist and more as something that allows you to feel settled and open. 

Ask Your Loved Ones in Spirit to Be Present

If you’re hoping to hear from someone specific, you can take a few moments beforehand to think of them, speak to them, or simply invite them to be part of your session.

There’s nothing formal required here. Just bringing your awareness to them can help you feel more connected and open.

Decide if You’d Like to Record and/or Take Notes

Some people prefer to fully be in the moment and listen, while others like to take notes or revisit the session afterward.

If recording is important to you, it’s helpful to plan ahead and ask about it. For my online sessions, I typically offer a recording afterward so you can revisit it, but every medium works a little differently. Otherwise, trust what allows you to feel most comfortable and present during the reading. 

Create a Comfortable Space

If your session is online, having a quiet, comfortable space can make a big difference.

You don’t need everything to be perfect, but minimizing distractions and giving yourself a little time to settle in beforehand can help you feel more relaxed and present.

If you’re meeting in person, allowing yourself enough time to arrive without feeling rushed can have the same effect.

These small details aren’t about getting everything right—they just help you feel more at ease so you can focus on the experience.

It’s also okay if your space isn’t perfect. I often meet with people who are sitting in their car or finding a quiet moment wherever they can, especially if privacy is limited at home.

The most important thing is that you’re able to be present and not distracted. If you’re driving or dealing with an unstable connection, it can make it harder to settle into the experience, so finding a place where you can pause and focus can really help.

Give Yourself a Moment to Settle

You don’t need to arrive perfectly calm or centered. Most people come to a reading with a mix of emotions, especially if they’re navigating grief or uncertainty.

Taking a few deep breaths or giving yourself a few quiet moments before your session can help you feel more present. And if things feel a little chaotic leading up to it, that’s okay too. You can simply come as you are.

What To Expect During Your Reading

Stay Open 

As the reading begins, it’s natural to notice your mind trying to follow along, make sense of things, or even anticipate what might come next.

The most helpful thing you can do is stay open to what’s being shared, even if it’s not exactly what you expected.

When we become too focused on hearing something specific, it can be easy to miss the information that’s actually coming through. Letting the experience unfold without trying to guide it usually creates the strongest connection.

What if Something Doesn't Make Sense? 

It’s completely normal for something to come through that doesn’t make sense right away.

Sometimes information lands immediately, and other times it may feel unfamiliar or unclear in the moment. This doesn’t necessarily mean it’s incorrect—it may just need a little more context or time.

That said, it’s always okay to say when something doesn’t resonate. A good medium will want that feedback and can use it to take another look at what’s coming through.

You don’t need to try to figure everything out in the moment. The goal is simply to stay present and respond honestly to what you’re receiving.

Use Your Voice

During a reading, your responses play an important role in how the session unfolds.

You don’t need to explain or provide a lot of detail, but simply responding with something like “yes,” “no,” or “I’m not sure” can be really helpful. It allows the information to keep moving without interrupting the flow of the reading.

If something doesn’t make sense, it’s okay to say that too. Honest feedback helps keep everything clear and allows the communication to stay focused.

It’s Okay to Feel Emotional

It’s very common for emotions to come up during a reading.

For many people, this is the first time they’ve had space to connect in this way, and it can bring up a mix of feelings—grief, relief, love, or even surprise.

There’s no need to hold anything back or try to stay composed. Being emotional won’t interfere with the reading. In many cases, it’s simply part of the experience.

Allowing yourself to feel whatever comes up can help you process the information more fully and stay present with what’s being shared.

Let the Experience Unfold 

As the reading comes to a close, it’s natural to want to make sense of everything right away.

Some parts may feel clear immediately, while others may stay with you and unfold over time. You don’t need to understand or interpret everything in the moment.

The most helpful approach is to let the experience be what it is, without trying to force meaning or draw quick conclusions.

Often, the parts that don’t fully make sense at first are the ones that become clearer later.

What To Do After Your Reading

Give Yourself Time to Process

After a reading, it can be helpful to give yourself a little space to take it all in.

Some parts may feel clear right away, while others may stay with you and unfold over time. There’s no need to rush to make sense of everything immediately.

If you can, allowing yourself some quiet time afterward. Resting, going for a walk, or simply having a moment to yourselfcan help you process the experience more fully.

Reflect on What Stood Out

You may find it helpful to reflect on what felt most meaningful during your session.

This doesn’t need to be formal. Some people like to journal, while others simply think back on the experience later in the day or over the next few days.

Often, the information that stays with you or continues to come to mind is worth paying attention to.

Trust Your Own Intuition

A reading isn’t meant to replace your own inner knowing—it’s meant to support it.

The most important part of any session is not just the information that comes through, but how it helps you connect with your own sense of clarity and understanding.

If something resonates deeply, that feeling matters. And if something doesn’t, it’s okay to trust that too.

If you’re interested in exploring your intuition more deeply, I’ve written more about this in my book Uncovering Intuition: Guidance, Inspiration, and Exercises to Unlock Your Inner Wisdom.

Give It Time Before Your Next Reading

It’s common to wonder when—or if—you should schedule another reading.

In my experience, it can be helpful to give yourself some time after a session. Not because there’s a rule around it, but because what comes through in a reading often continues to unfold afterward.

Sometimes the meaning becomes clearer over time, or you begin to notice things in your life that connect back to what was shared.

Allowing that space can help you stay connected to your own intuition, rather than looking outside of yourself for answers too quickly.

If you feel drawn to experience a reading for yourself, you can learn more about my sessions here.