Psychologists sometimes refer to people as “empaths” to reference an individual’s highly empathic nature. They describe “empaths” as people who are highly sensitive to others’ emotions,  who often take those emotions on as their own.

Emotion Researchers generally define empathy as the ability to sense the emotions of others as well as imagine what someone else is thinking or feeling. New Age Spirituality has added an element of supernaturalness to the term Empath, implying that empaths have a near psychic ability to sense emotions.

Reimagining Empaths

I've worked with many clients who identify as an empath and it is often an  identity they’ve adopted or that’s been given to them by a spiritual teacher.  I have never found the term to be particularly helpful. As humans we are all empathic, just as we are all intuitive, and may be affected by the emotional state of the people around us. The problem for me with labeling people as empaths is that it sometimes becomes a catch-all term for anyone who is struggling to understand their highly sensitive or intuitive nature. Often the label is given without any guidance or further opportunities to learn and this may feel disempowering.

I also don’t resonate with the “supernatural” aspect of this label and consider being an empath to be the most natural thing for a human to be. Empathy and compassion come easily to most people. It is how we handle our emotions and set boundaries that are the tricky parts. While I don’t fully resonate with the term Empath, I have a deep respect and love for many people who identify with this term. This is why I still choose to use it and also why I want to point out some of the ways it may not be helpful to us.

Highly Sensitive People 

One term I find much more helpful is “Highly Sensitive Person”, first introduced in the early 1990s by Psychologist Dr. Elain Aron. Dr. Aron defined a HSP as someone who experiences acute physical, mental, or emotional responses to stimuli in their environment and even their own thoughts, emotions and realizations. Oftentimes when I recommend learning more about being a highly sensitive person to a client who already identifies themselves as a Psychic, Medium or Empath, they are resistant to this term and see it as a negative label. I feel this really speaks to our conditioning as a society that views sensitivity as a weakness. Mediumship, however, carries with it a great sensitivity to not only the world around us, but the unseen world. I tend to use the terms Highly Intuitive Person, Highly Sensitive Person or Empath interchangeably as they have the same general meaning to me, someone who has a heightened sensitivity to the world around them including the unseen world, including energy. Empaths and highly sensitive people may be easily affected by their surroundings including sound, smells, touch.

Mediums are people who are able to act as a bridge between the spirit world and this world and are able to perceive the spirit world and this in itself is a sensitivity. Oftentimes the more we develop our intuition or mediumship, the more sensitive to our surroundings we become. It’s also my experience that many intuitive people feel emotions more deeply than others and often need time to process and understand life changes, recharge after interacting with others, or adjust to transitions. 

You can read more on HSP and take the self assessment here https://hsperson.com/ 

Some common traits of Empaths, HSP, and Highly Intuitive People are:

Sensitivity to stimulus (bright lights or loud noises)

Dislike of crowds

People often confide in you

Vivid imaginations

You’ve been told you're “too sensitive” 

Needing to recharge after interactions with others

Difficulty setting boundaries

Feeling a lot of empathy 

Feeling like you can communicate with animals 

Are there treatments for being an Empath?  

There is no “treatment” for being an empath. Only a path towards understanding what your own energy feels like, understanding how your body responds to emotions, and setting boundaries accordingly. However, there are a variety of treatments available from the spiritual community which range in effectiveness and ethics.

The people who seek out these “treatments” often feel that their energy and well being is  dependent on them. Often, people believe that others can influence their energy without their consent, or without even being in the same room. Some may believe they have been cursed, that they are carrying trauma from a past life, or that being an empath is like an illness that requires healing.

I have had clients come to me who have spent thousands of dollars on crystals to “heal their energy,” or been asked to pay to have someone remove a curse from them. There is also the less extreme (but also problematic) practice of feeling dependent on regular healing treatments to remove energetic cords or attachments. 

While there are many gifted healers working today, and most people I encounter operate with integrity, there certainly are people with problematic methods, and a few that take advantage of people when they are vulnerable. Many spiritual practices are not highly regulated, and when looking for a reputable healer I suggest getting recommendations from someone before entrusting them with your energy.

Feeling Drained 

A common cause for HSP or Empaths seeking healing is feeling “drained” by other people. In my practice clients often report that someone else’s energy is “draining them.” I have experienced this feeling, too, and I have learned to acknowledge my role in the experience. It’s not possible for another person to supernaturally “take” our energy if we are not giving it. It is the act of engaging with someone that can be draining. Aggravation, anxiety, having to assert ourselves repeatedly all take energy. If I find myself trying to energetically resist someone who is pushing my boundaries this will feel draining as well. I have to remind myself to stay present and trust myself to hold my boundaries. If our boundaries are firm, essentially, we can skip the worry and anxiety that we feel when they are being threatened, because we know we can rely on ourselves. 

What can happen over time when we are in relationships with people who require a lot of our energy to be in their presence, is that we can start to feel drained energetically, and eventually feel disconnected from our spirit. We may then, over time, become accustomed to feeling energetically drained.

How do you know what your own energy feels like?

The easiest way is to spend time with yourself. Get to know who you truly are beyond any of your roles. Feel beneath the roles of parent, partner, friend, teacher, etc., into who you truly are when you’re alone and are not  presenting your energy to another person. Journaling, mediation, and spending time alone can help.  

Setting Boundaries 

Once you gain a deeper understanding of what your own energy feels like, and how your emotions feel in your body, you’ll want to set boundaries to protect yourself and your energy. Boundaries are difficult, but an essential part of caring for yourself. Saying no without apology or explanation is saying yes to yourself, your energy, and anything you hope to create.

To Connect to Your Own Energy try this Guided Meditation

Read More: 5 Expert Tips to Improve and Develop Your Psychic Abilities

Learn more about Intuitive Readings